beauty in the blurry

the glass sliding doors opened and people were waiting, with an old man singing the same five christmas carols on karaoke. i am wearing a beautiful scarf around my neck and my favorite purple cardigan. scanning the crowd for some sign of you. i don't seem to blend, in fact, they thought i was from the royal dutch airlines, as if i had the answers to the delayed flight and the lack of ability to get through customs, but instead i took my place among them with the same puzzled look.

soon enough you'd come for me, i knew it.

you make your way through the rows of people to find me in the center, as everyone turned to face me, i jumped into your arms, and found home right there. every face lit up and cheers and clapping erupted.with a cigarette in your hand to cope with your worldly travels, we drive off.

soon enough, we'd find ourselves somewhere else.

as the door of 1610 astor place opened, your family greeted us with huge and warmth. the kind of warmth that yeager brings to your throat as it goes down. it was a party that moved fast like the beat of your favorite classical song, quick and painless.blue dixie cups posed less of a problem when filled with the sangria your mom always makes, with the orange slices, the colors fit perfectly in the cup and in my mouth. cup after cup. rum and coke. sweet tea vodka with lemonade.it was one after the other as my thoughts took flight and my laughter kept me grounded.each drink was taken with class and with that followed the pictures.outside it was cold, so crisp you could breathe out smoke.as family members left, and the few in their twenties held onto the party till the sun started to rise.

soon enough, my laughing would be too much.

i reached the bed in the corner, just in time to burst into giggles, with the realization that i was indeed exhausted.i crawled in with plaid pjs and passed out.being held and tucked in by you, was something i had left far behind in the summer.but love, oh how i missed you.

as we woke up the next morning i tried to string each thought together, as if i were sewing a quilt of memories, only to realize, that my memories were a blur, a blur of colors, a blur of emotions, and thoughts.

last night was simply...

a beautiful blur.